I Can't Hide It Anymore
by SpiderNeko
Summary: Between flights, Alfred stays with Arthur, but suddenly reveals a secret he's kept for too long that could alter their friendship forever. But will it change for the better, or for the worse? USxUK
1. Chapter 1

"Hey, Arthur? Can you come pick me up from the airport?" Alfred said through the phone. His voice was soft and nervous, almost. Arthur had not heard from the American in a while, and was surprised to get a call from him, but he didn't expect the call to make him feel so concerned.

"Alfred... what are you doing at an airport?" the Briton asked, "And at a UK airport, for that matter." Alfred paused, but answered with, "I had a little business here, that's all." Arthur sighed loudly, but agreed to pick him up. Arthur hung up the phone, but couldn't help but feel something was going on, something that worried him a little.

Arthur shuffled through the crowd of hurrying people and scanned his surroundings. Through the crowd, he caught a glimpse of someone's hair that was very familiar, and pushed his way toward it. Alfred was standing along the wall with his suitcase near the entrance to the washrooms, and watched Arthur stumble about. He chuckled quietly to himself.

"There you are." Arthur huffed. "Let's get out of here, I hate busy airports." He grabbed cloth on Alfred's sleeve and pulled him off the wall.

"What, too many people for you?" Alfred joked as Arthur pulled him through behind him.

"It's far too hectic in these places." Arthur explained. Smiling, Alfred picked up pace and passed Arthur, pulling him along now, instead. Arthur felt annoyed by Alfred's behaviour. He had always been a bit of a goof and doing odd things... but now, it seemed to feel different. Alfred seemed to be the same as always, but to Arthur, something had changed, he knew that but, but the fact that he had no idea what the change was annoyed him a little.

Alfred tossed his case into the backseat of Arthur's car, and then got in the passenger's seat up front. He adjusted the chair so it was back a little, and closed his eyes. Arthur got into the driver's seat and grumbled when he saw that Alfred was already asleep. But, instead of waking him, he left him alone. The drive would take around a half-hour, which would give him time to rest. They could chat when they got back to Arthur's house.

"Thanks for picking me up, Artie." Alfred dropped his suitcase onto the floor in the entrance hall and began to walk forward.

"Hey, don't just leave this in the hall here, take it-" Arthur groaned as he lifted the case himself, "-to the living room or something!" Alfred playfully ignored him, and went to the living room on his own. Arthur cursed under his breath and carried the case into the room, unable to keep him from dropping hard onto the floor. He flinched and panicked a little, hoping he didn't scratch the hardwood flooring. Alfred flopped onto the couch and sunk into the cushions, closing his eyes again. He breathed out deeply, almost a sigh. Arthur sat raggedly in his armchair, again annoyed that Alfred had fallen asleep before finally being able to chat with him again, since the last time they spoke. It had been beginning to feel like ages had passed since that time.

"Hey, Arthur." The tired American began. _Oh, I guess he wasn't asleep_, Arthur thought.

"Uh, yes, Alfred?"

"I... Would it be too much to ask if I stayed here for a while? A couple of days or so?" he asked, in a low, soft-spoken voice, as if he felt he shouldn't bother asking. Arthur was taken by surprise.

"Why?" Arthur asked. He didn't know why, but something tightened up in his chest, like he was bracing himself for something. It made him almost not want to hear the answer.

"I still have another flight to catch in a couple days, wondered if I could stay here." His answer was normal, luckily. Arthur felt a little more at ease, but not quite. There was still something happening, Alfred was never that good at hiding things, and it hurt him to think that something troubling could happen to his "brother". They weren't related, he knew that, but he had know him for so very long, since Alfred was very small, and he had grown to be quite attached to the young fool.

"Oh, well, if that's all, you can stay for a while; I'll make up a bed for you." Arthur lifted from his chair and ventured toward the stairs to the second floor, "It is getting late; it wouldn't be a bad idea to get ourselves to sleep, especially you."

"Sorry about dumping myself on you like this, pal." He lazily called out.

"Don't worry about it; it's not a big deal." Arthur claimed. He acted bothered, but he was actually quite happy to see Alfred again, it really had been a long time. He could barely even remember the last conversation they had.

Arthur carried back the sheets from the linen closet and made his way to the spare bedroom across the hall from his own, only to hear a stirring from his chamber. Puzzled, he peered inside and saw Alfred in _his_ bed.

"Alfred, what are you doing in there, you're sleeping in the spare room!" he shouted. Al shuffled a smidge.

"I couldn't wait, I got tired."

"You've been tired all evening."

"Yeah, I know."

"Whatever," Arthur sighed, "I'll take the spare room."

"...You don't have to do that." Alfred said quietly.

"Are you taking the spare, then?" Alfred didn't answer. England waited for one, but gave up. "I'll take the spare... Good night." England trudged off, across the hall, and grudgingly set up the sheets. _Bollocks..._he breathed as he flapped up one of the sheets. Alfred just lay there, but muttered something quietly, shyly.

"You could've just stayed in here, too..."

He closed his eyes and slept for the rest of the night...


	2. Chapter 2

"ALFRED! I'M HEADING OUT FOR A BIT, DON'T SLEEP NI ALL DAY, WAKE UP SOON!" Arthur called loudly so that Alfred would hear him. Al groaned as he tiredly lifted himself up to a sitting position. He heard the thud of the front door closing and snapped out of his daze. He threw the sheets off of him and raced downstairs to the door, only to find, out of breath, that Arthur had already gone. Alfred panted and slouched.

"Crap... I'm too late..." he murmured. He staggered into the kitchen and opened the fridge to see what he could have for breakfast, but saw that there was next to nothing inside. "Oh, he must've gone to get groceries." He deducted. He thought for a second, and then rushed to throw his jacket and shoes.

"Artie! Wait!" Alfred called. Arthur turned and grew a bother look on his face.

"What are you doing here? You were fast asleep not ten seconds ago! Crazy bloke!" Arthur examined him. "And you're still in yesterday's clothes, not surprising." Arthur turned away again to continue on his errand. "You're doing your laundry when we get back; you're going to stink eventually." Alfred was bombarded with complaints; he could hardly get a word in edgewise, but he followed Arthur anyway.

"So, what are we getting?" he asked, knowingly.

"I'm getting groceries. I don't have nearly enough food at my house at the moment for the both of us." Arriving at the grocer, they entered the automatic doors. Arthur grabbed a basket, but stopped, causing Alfred to bump into him.

"What is it?" he asked. Arthur quickly raised the handle of the basket up to Alfred.

"Here, get anything you think you'll want to eat." Alfred was surprised, but smiled and took the basket.

"You're getting old if you can't remember what I like eating anymore." He joked.

"Shut up! Just go already, you idiot!" he roared, frustrated. Alfred laughed and ran away from the raging Brit. He slowed his pace after taking a turn down an aisle. He gripped the handle with his bare hand, and felt the heat left behind on it from Arthur. He hadn't realized it himself, but others in the store around him did, but he was smiling like a fool for the whole time he was on his own.

"Are you finally done? You better not be costing me a fortune with all that." Arthur said with a pouted face. Alfred strolled out of the aisle with his basket filled. He picked up a package of hamburger meat, some buns, a bag of French fries, microwavable pizzas, and a small container of ice cream. "Is that really all you're getting?" Arthur remarked.

"What's wrong with it?" Alfred asked, confused.

"It's CRAP health-wise. Good thing I found some healthier food, myself." Arthur began emptying his basket onto the belt at the cash; his purchases were some potatoes, packages of tea, and an assortment of vegetables.

"Hey, no need to get potatoes, I got some already," Alfred said, holding up the bag of fries.

"Those don't count." Arthur unloaded his basket, then started on Alfred's.

"Hey, what are you doing?" Al protested, "I'll pay for my stuff."

"You idiot," Arthur began as he continued to empty his basket, obstinate. "You're my guest, so I'll pay for things." Alfred was surprised, but lit up at his display of generosity. IT was then that something stirred inside of him, the urge to say something that he'd really wanted to tell Arthur, but he quickly stopped himself, and his smile faded. Arthur never noticed it, though.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Alfred had a hard time cooking with Arthur always insisting that he do it.

"I can cook just fine!" he hollered, reaching around trying to get the stirring spoon from Al. He laughed and always kept the kitchenware out of Arthur's reach.

"You paid, so I'll cook, that's final." He said, carefully avoiding the fact that Arthur's cooking isn't that great in the first place.

"My kitchen, my rules!" Arthur tried his best to get a hold of the spoon, but Alfred's body was always caught in between, pushing Arthur back. He just couldn't get around it. It really bothered him. Alfred continued to prepare dinner, but lost focus when he noticed that Arthur gave up and went to sit at the table. His heart sank, and the part of him where Arthur had been now felt cold.

"H-hey, don't you want this anymore?" he taunted, holding the spoon toward him, uneasiness in his voice.

"I don't care anymore, I'm tired." Arthur replied, resting his head up, a hand under his chin. Sweat rolled down Alfred's cheek, desperation creeping in.

"Come on, I'll let you cook." He insisted.

"It's fine, I really don't care anymore."

"Please!" Alfred begged. Arthur's eyes widened and he looked at him, surprised and confused. Alfred froze near completely, shocked by what he just did, his face turning red. There was silence.

"Alfred, are you alright?" Arthur began, but Alfred dropped the spoon onto the table and tore away, racing up the stairs. "ALFRED!" Arthur cried. He jumped up from the table, but stood there, and did not chase him. Instead, he wandered over to the stove, checked the stew they were making, and turning the burner off. "Foods all done." He mumbled.

He scooped some stew into bowls for the both of them, and went to the bottom of the stairs. He listened to see if he could hear Alfred up there, but it was quiet. His chest felt tight and fragile. He took a step up.

"Alfred. Please come down. I have your food ready." He called. There was no answer. "Alfred, are you up there?" he called again. He heard something shuffle, but still no answer. Arthur wasn't sure what to do about all this. Alfred was acting strange for some reason, and Arthur began to think that maybe, he really wanted to know what it was. Something was making him act this way, and it made Arthur furious.

Upstairs, Alfred had found himself huddled behind on the floor alongside the bed. He was hard to be seen in the darkened room. His face was completely red, and he felt embarrassed. _Damn it_, he thought, _I can't say things like that. He'll figure it out. _He buried his face into his knees, sadly. "But, I have to tell him... this is my last chance."

"Alfred, I'm coming up!" Arthur declared, scaring Alfred. He could hear Arthur on the stairs, getting closer, it made his heart race. He wasn't ready to face him yet. He held his legs tighter, his fingers turning white from the pressure. He slightly jumped when he felt Arthur's hand on his own... The instant that happened, Alfred's anxiety melted away, and his grip weakened. Arthur pulled Al's hand off and pulled him up. Not saying a word, he led him down the stairs again, and seated him at the table.

The stew was still steaming, and it smelled wonderful. Alfred looked up from his bowl to see Arthur paying no mind and enjoying his own. The silence was crushing, and it made Alfred sad, but it made Arthur even angrier, also the fact that Alfred hadn't eaten yet.

"Y'know, Alfred, if something is troubling you, just tell me. You don't have to hide anything." Arthur explained between spoonfuls. "You've know me forever, you should be able to tell me by now if something's wrong."

"I can't... not now." He whispered. Arthur raised an eyebrow angrily. Alfred looked back up at Arthur again, and could see that his actions were stressing him out. He took a deep swallow, and sat up straight in his chair. Arthur began listening. "Can I ask you one thing first?"

"Sure." Arthur had no idea as to what it could be about.

"I... If someone close to you said something... special... to you, what would you do?" he was panicking.

"What the hell do you mean by 'special'?"

"Like... maybe... that they..." Arthur waited for him to complete his sentence. "... love you?"

"That they lo-" Arthur stopped. His chest got very tight, like something was pressed hard against it, crushing him. Alfred was quiet. Arthur could hear the blood rushing through his ears, he could hear his heart beating, fast.

_Oh my God, is he saying what I think he's saying?_

Alfred looked up, right into his eyes, startling him. Arthur tried not to make eye contact, but saw in his eyes that, they were both equally as scared, as nervous. Arthur figured Alfred would say something, but all he did was stare, with a sad look on his face, and for a second, Arthur lost control of his speech.

"STOP FROWNING AND SMILE!" he shouted, surprising them both. Arthur had no idea what he was saying, but rolled with it. "You finally visit after being gone for so long, and all you've done is frown, it seems. Would you just smile already, you twit. I'm tired of that look of yours!" When next he looked at Alfred's face, he did see a smile, a large, happy smile. It made him feel relieved.

"Sorry." He laughed. His smile left though, he was not quite done talking yet. "But, do you understand? What I'm trying to say?" Arthur flinched.

"Maybe." He answered shyly, turning away.

"Arthur... I," he began. Arthur turned back. "I'm sorry." Alfred stood up and left...

_Huh?_

_He... apologized?_

_He didn't... confess... or anything... _Arthur thought, terribly bewildered. Millions of thoughts bombarded him mind.

_How can he just start a conversation like that and just... end it! That blithering idiot! He was about to confess, I know he was! How did he fall for me? We haven't even spoken in nearly a year! He can't just leave after getting me all worked up like that! THAT'S STUPID!_

_...I've been worried._

_...Jerk._

Frustrated, Arthur followed Alfred back, once again, up the stairs, but found that he was in neither his room nor the spare room. He could hear him talking from down the hall and followed the sound. Alfred was in the old study, on the phone.

"Hello, I need a cab." He said painfully into the receiver. England exploded, he grabbed the phone and slammed it down. "Arthur! I-"

"I CAN'T BELEIVE THIS!" he roared. "YOU'RE RUNNING AWAY AFTER THAT!" Alfred recoiled, his head dropped.

"If I tell you what I really want to say, things will change. Forgot I said anything, please."

"SINCE WHEN ARE YOU SUCH A GIRLY, LITTLE WHINER!" Arthur blasted, getting Alfred's full attention. "YOU'VE BEEN GONE SO LONG AND WHEN YOU FINALLY VISIT ME AGAIN, YOU'RE LIKE THIS!" Arthur was furious, and yelled as loud as he could, hoping it would get through Alfred's head. "THIS WHOLE TIME, I'VE BEEN WORRIED SICK THINKING YOU WERE IN SERIOUS TROUBLE, AND WHEN YOU FINALLY TELL ME WHAT IT IS, YOU RUN OFF! I HAVE TO KNOW!" The last thing he said found its way to Alfred's heart. "YOU'RE LIKE FAMILY TO ME! YOU'RE MY BROTHER, ALFRED!" And that crushed it. His heartbreak was visible to Arthur, who didn't quite understand.

"If you think that... then I can't stay." He moaned sombrely. He pushed past Arthur and left the room. Arthur made an attempt to follow him, but fell to his knees.

"BLOODY HELL!" he roared. He pounded the floor with his fists. "You twit..." he choked, "You do love me, IDIOT!"

_He's just started feeling this way now... _

_Why'd it take him so long._


	3. Chapter 3

Arthur pulled himself up off of his knees, they shook slightly, and it worried him. He would've fallen back down if his mind hadn't been jogged by the ringing of the old telephone on the desk; the one Alfred was using earlier. He felt colder. In an attempt to ignore the chill, he answered the phone.

"Hello," he greeted, sound more dismal than he expected.

"Arthur, is Alfred there?" asked the worried voice on the phone.

"Matthew?" Arthur recognized the voice over the phone as Alfred's brother, Matthew. There was a hint of urgency in his voice. "Uh, what was that about Alfred?"

"Sorry about the call, it's supper over there now, isn't it?" the sheepish man apologized.

"No, it's alright... Supper ended a while ago." He replied, trying not to sound depressing.

"Oh, alright then, well, I was wondering if Alfred was there with you. He seems to have gone missing."

"Missing?" Arthur thought about telling Matthew that Alfred was just there, but decided against it. He knew it wasn't a kind thing to do at this time, but his curiosity compelled him to hold out on his information.

"He left around two days ago, saying he had to see someone. He only left a note, and I hoped you might have seen him, his flight was to England."

"Who did he have to see?"

"I don't know, but he seemed liked he had been preparing himself for something, so it must be someone pretty important."

"Oh."

"Please, if you end up finding him, don't let him out of your sight and call me, I'm really worried. He hasn't acted this strange since... I think around the last time the three of us were really together. For new years, two years back."

Arthur didn't say anything.

"We need to celebrate this year again. We were all too busy with work and things like that last year. We should all celebrate it here. Anyway, I have to make another call. I have to go, sorry."

"Yes... good bye, Matthew."

"Bye."

They both hung up their phones. Arthur stood, replaying the conversation in his head over and over and over.

_He ran away from home and came here. Matthew thinks he's missing. And he hasn't acted this way since two years ago..._

Arthur's brow furrowed, he was very cross, but he felt a smile hiding within himself. He, in suit, grabbed his coat and rushed to the front door. He reached for the knob, but halted, forgetting something important.

.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

Alfred had not gone very far at all, in fact, he had seated himself on sidewalk, leaning his back against the iron fence around Arthur's property. He lost his ambition to run off again and sat there, silent. He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and turned it on, seeing 25 missed calls from Matthew. He turned it back off again.

"I can't go home yet..." he muttered to himself. "Oh... wait... He doesn't..."

...

_I don't have a reason not to go home anymore._

"Alfred!" he heard someone shout. Arthur burst through the gate and ran out onto the sidewalk. He peered left and right, searching for any sign of Al. He took in a deep breath, and called again, and it was the longest and loudest holler Alfred had ever heard from Arthur. It would have lasted longer, but it was cut short by a choke in Arthur's throat.

"That stupid, bloody, jerk!" he choked, "He could be anywhere by now! I can't believe I thought he'd still be near here." He slumped and something dropped down from his wrist. Arthur was slow to notice, but Alfred saw it right away. He pushed himself up and tiptoed closer to Arthur, who didn't hear him approach. Quietly, he knelt down and gently picked up the object.

It was a bead bracelet, made out of tacky craft-store plastic beads. All different colors and shapes, and a choice few beads with letters printed on them, two "A"s and an "M", for Alfred, Arthur, and Matthew. Alfred remembered it well.

"This was from New Years." He said out loud. Arthur spun around on his heels and spotted Alfred, he had startled him greatly.

"Alfred!" he gasped. He knelt down with him and grabbed onto him by the shoulders. "You've been here this whole time?" Neither of them could tell if it was the cold wind outside making each other's cheeks turn red, or something else.

"I made this for you... two years ago." Alfred said, looking directly into Arthur's eyes. It made Arthur nervous. "You said it was childish, and that you'd never wear it in public." Alfred laughed. Arthur listened. "I saw some other people with bracelets like this in the town that day. I knew you wouldn't like something like this, though; I just wanted to make something cool for you. Mattie helped me with it, I was real clumsy."

He paused.

"Why did you keep this?"

"You dork." Arthur finally said, "I wore that for the whole spring." Alfred was stunned, and his face turned redder.

"Why'd you do that? This thing was ugly, even I admit that!" he puzzled.

"I got made fun of for wearing it, but it was a gift, and... I liked it." He said, "Matthew just called me, and it was then that I remembered it. I wanted you to know that I kept it."

"Wait, Mattie called you? CRAP!" Alfred jumped back up to a standing position, escaping Arthur's hands. "What did he tell you?"

"He said he thought you were missing."

"Did you tell him I was here?" he cringed. Arthur stood up and answered.

"No, I didn't." Alfred was surprised again.

"Whoa," he said, amazed, "You lied to Mattie... You totally lied to Mattie!" he laughed. He was then grabbed by Arthur, who, despite the fact the he was smaller than him, shoved Alfred against the fence, pinning him there.

"Don't run away, alright? I have something to tell you!" it made Alfred sad to think of how he'd run off so much. He piped down and listened. "You need to stop being so idiotic, and you need to quit being so whiny! So that's why I'm saying this now, it's the only way to fix this it seems!"

"Artie..." Alfred whimpered, thinking he was going to get yelled at even worse.

"I do think of you as being like a brother to me, but I know very well that there is no blood-relation between us, and it was after you gave me this that I thought that you were finally starting to have feelings for me."

"Holy—You knew it then?"

"Would you shut up and let me talk," he blushed. "I was because I liked you way before then! I've been waiting forever for this!"

Alfred froze.

"I've always loved you, it's just, that old brotherly love grew over time. You understand that, I know you do."Arthur looked up at Alfred to see tears in his eyes. "Wh-why are you crying you idiot, stop that!" Arthur yelled, flustered. Alfred countered Arthur's pin with a huge hug, sending him a step back.

"I'm so happy to hear you say that!" he choked. Arthur, pouting, patted him on the back, hoping he'd let go of him so he could breath, but, then again, it felt like his hug wasn't tight enough.

"Come on..." he finally said, "Let's go inside."

"I gotta call Mattie now, don't I?" Alfred sighed, releasing Arthur from his grip.

"You do, he's worried, but that doesn't mean you have to go back home yet." Arthur answered, grinning. "We still have all that food in the fridge; it's more than what one person needs." Alfred smiled, and followed Arthur inside, but not before he gave his a small peck on the cheek. Arthur tried to brush it off like it was nothing, but Alfred could see that there was no hiding the smile on Arthur's - and his own - face.

.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

_-xX_The End_Xx-_


End file.
